See it at the Movies

IT FOLLOWS

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(Ridiculous teenage flick)

The last Saturday afternoon in March offered little choice of movies. No way were we going to see “Get Hard.” The trailers were more than we needed to endure.

The Associated Press gave “It Follows,” a teen horror flick, four stars, and Rotten Tomatoes, a usually reliable online movie reviewing service, gave it an incredible 97%. Even though we hate the genre, we thought that it must have some redeeming qualities.

We walked out of the theatre shaking our heads and wondering what we missed that these so-called sophisticated critics raved about.

Filled with teen actors we were unfamiliar with, “It Follows” dragged along for an hour and 40 minutes with a few shocking scenes and a multitude of pretentious scenes that left us scratching our heads.

Maika Monroe plays Jay, a pretty high schooler who goes on a date with 19-year-old Hugh. After having sex in the back seat of his car, he ties her up in a wheelchair, takes her to an abandoned building and tells her that she will be stalked by a supernatural being that can take different forms and will kill her.

But wait, there’s hope. All she has to do is “pass it on.” If she doesn’t and gets killed, it will kill him (Huh?).

Unlike the “pay it forward” theory, “pass it on” means having sex with someone else to free yourself. You’ve got to be kidding!

Jay’s teen friends won’t let her out of their sight. One nerdy friend even offers to be the next recipient of “pass it on.” It all ends with an utterly ridiculous scene at a pool.

Amazingly, the kids seem to live in their own little world. No parents or adults are ever present, even in the early morning and late evening moments in their homes, sort of like a Peanuts cartoon. If we’ve missed something in this pretentious garbage, please let us know.

Rated R, with prurient sex, frontal nudity, violence and profanity.

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